Every Kick in The Ass is a Step Forward
When I was a student, I had the opportunity to travel to USA during the summer through a Work & Travel program. I went there for two summers in a row. This was happening back in 2005/2006. Even to this day I remember so vividly that all I wanted was to see the world, to discover new places and meet interesting people. My intuition was telling me that there has to be more to this world than I knew at the time. And on top of everything, I had a lot of energy that needed to be channelled towards something new.
During my first summer in US, I travelled all over Ohio, working for a company that was operating in the entertainment business. Being there, working side by side with other students from the program and with locals, was an eye-opening experience for me. I learned a lot by sharing a shelter with people from different cultures and backgrounds. However, the living conditions where not the best and neither the pay check at the end of the month. But all in all, it was a good experience for me, because I had gained confidence in myself that I could manage on my own in a totally unknown environment, where nobody knew who I was, where absolutely nothing recommended me, and all that mattered was how I managed to relate to others and put my skills to work in order to earn some money.
It was my second summer in US that truly gave me boost of confidence and left me with some of the most remarkable memories of my youth. Because after my first summer that I travelled with the W&T program, knowing how things work, I’d managed to get myself a better job, that time in Las Vegas. But even then, the job wasn’t the best fit for me. Nevertheless, I had to compromise, because I really wanted to get to Vegas and in order to get the visa, I had to have a job landed before getting there. So, I settled for the job, telling myself that if I had been able to manage things a year before in Ohio, for sure I’ll be able to cope with that one, too. Hence, in July 2006 I was landing at McCarran Airport.
The job turned out to a really bad fit for me indeed, even worse than I’d expected. After spending about two weeks doing something that didn’t bring me any satisfaction whatsoever, only a continuous pain in the ass, both because of the work itself and because of the manager I was working with, I decided that I needed to make a change. I felt like I was wasting precious time, because I only had four months to spend in the US and I wanted to get the maximum out of those months. I wanted to take full advantage of being in a cosmopolite city like Las Vegas, meet interesting people, discover interesting things and evolve as an individual. And nonetheless, earn more money.
Therefore, after a few days of intensely thinking about what to do, one morning I decided that there was no point in wasting any more time and that I had to take action. I needed to change jobs and the first one I could think of was to work as a waiter. I wrote a CV by hand, made about 10 copies, hopped on my bike and started touring the streets around the block I was living in, determined to leave my CV at all the restaurants, pubs and bars that came across on my way. And that’s exactly what I did that day. But I realized after the first two places I went in and left my CV, that I had a problem. After leaving a CV, it will be difficult to be reached, because I didn’t have a US cell phone number. I deflated pretty quickly and ended the day abruptly, heading home.
I felt that the lack of a contact was a barrier on my path to happiness and that I was a prisoner of the circumstances. But after that night, during which I was more awake than sleeping, the next day I pulled my shit together, I plucked up the courage to take another shot at it, but this time without CVs. This time I had to talk directly to someone there, telling them what I wanted.
The fact that I had to ask someone so bluntly to give me a chance, was not comfortable for me at all. Maybe because I was coming from a culture where direct and assertive speaking was not the usual. I was taught to put in the effort, and wait until someone noticed me and decided I deserve more. This time, however, I felt that I did not have the time to wait to be noticed, nor did I consider myself in the right place for that to be happening. Just like a prisoner who had been unjustly imprisoned, I felt that I had to escape! So, the only viable option this time was to “force” things to get out of that situation and change them in my favour. I would take a deep breath, hop on my bike and hit places again. And once I got there, I would ask to speak to whomever was in charge of hiring, telling them directly and concisely what I was looking for: work.
I got on my bike and set off. I arrived in front of the first restaurant - it was an Applebee’s. I got off my bike and searched for a place to lock it up. The whole time I was doing that, my heart was in my mouth, and my emotions were choking me at the thought of the conversation I was going to have, but I decided that I had to overcome that fear and just go for it. Whatever happens, happens! I took a deep breath and went inside. I asked the hostess at the entrance to speak to a manager, because I was looking for a job. She asked me if I had a resume on me. I told her that I didn’t and that I just wanted to talk to the manager. She gave a funny look, but probably the cocktail of emotions I was displaying - fear and determination among many others - convinced her, and to my pleasant surprise she told me to wait until she calls someone. After a short while, that seemed like an eternity to me at the time, during which I was breathing like I was fighting for my life, somebody came, introduced himself as the shift manager and we started talking. The conversation turned out to be beneficial for me, because despite my emotions I managed to express my point of view quite well, and although I didn’t get a job, I learned some things that helped me later. I had realized that that kind of direct approach was a common practice there and, on top of that, it was also seen as a sign of determination and appreciated. At the same time, I understood that I needed to structure my ideas and tune my speech more adequately. I left that place confident that this was the right approach. If the day before I had ended up in a dead end, now on the contrary, I felt like a door had opened for me. That was the moment when I knew that one way or another, I would manage to find another job and that I would escape from that prisoner feeling. And the feeling was visceral and genuine.
I went home again, put my thoughts in order, tuned my speech, and decided that I would keep looking for that job until I’ll find it, no matter how many managers I had to talk to. And I went out again that very afternoon, because I felt a good energy and I didn’t want to let it go to waste. It turned out to be an excellent decision to go out visiting places again, because at the third or fourth place I went in to talk to the manager, I found the right person. It was an English Pub, where I came across a very nice lady manager, who, on top of everything else, appreciated the determination she saw in me. And she decided to give me a chance. She told me that they needed a busser and asked me when I could start. The enthusiasm I felt made me say that I could start the very next day. So, we shook hands and I headed home.
Only on the way home did I realize that I actually had a problem, that the next day I had to be in two places at the same time: at my old job and at my new one. For a few moments, I had thought that I would simply not go to my old job and would figure out how I would manage the situation later, but my conscience told me that the right thing to do was to inform about the situation. On the way home, I stopped at a public phone and called my soon-to-be former manager. I told him that I had found another job. I think I had a fair dose of luck at that moment, because that man could have caused me trouble if he wanted to, because I was living in a house that his company had arranged for us - the ones who were employed by his company - or he could have given me a negative review at the embassy that I had violated the terms of the contract and left the job based on which I had received the visa… but he did none of that. That was one of the moments when I saw the difference between the avatar and the real man behind the avatar. Although in our work relationship between me and him there were daily tensions and we didn’t get along very well, in reality the man behind the manager avatar, understood me, I think. He understood my torment, the fact that I didn’t feel good at that job, and also my determination to find something more suitable.
The next day I started working at the pub as a busser and after about two weeks I had already been offered a few shifts as a waiter in parallel. And after about a month I was already a full-time waiter. What followed, was perhaps the best summer of my youth, because every morning I woke up with excitement and anticipation for the upcoming day. It felt incredible being able to combine work with fun, meeting interesting people and learning new things. I had discovered how important it is to be able to make a living from something that you enjoy doing. That summer I realized that I can very well manage on my own and that I can earn a hell of a lot of money doing it!
