When You Turn The Lights On, The Elephant Has Nowhere To Hide
I was working for an IT services company and we had been approached by a new client who wanted us to take over and manage their IT infrastructure. I have a vivid memory of the first meeting with Mike, their CFO. I remember being stunned by his approach, how seamlessly he explained their needs, being direct and assertive, knowing exactly what points to emphasize in order for us to understand what he wanted, and also to convince us to join the choir under his conditions.
That project was announced to be a major challenge, because the company I was working for had never done something of that magnitude before — an end-to-end infrastructure management service. The owners wanted to take that step, because they saw an excellent opportunity for development, and when they offered me to lead the project, I said YES instantly, being curious to discover and learn something I had also never done before.
As it unfolded, it was indeed difficult, because under every rock we turned over, we found an issue. What I had suspected from the very beginning was confirming — the main reason we were hired for the job was because their internal IT department, who had been managing the infrastructure up to that point, had lost things out of control and we needed to get everything functional again. The datacenter needed to be relocated, we had to redesign the network, part of the equipment needed replacement, applications needed to be upgraded, contracts with suppliers had to be renegotiated, etc.
It took us about a year to get things working smoothly. I had the opportunity to work directly with Mike. I remember how I eager I was to be in meetings with him, because even though we talked business, it felt like I was learning real life lessons. I was fascinated by his abilities, some innate, but most educated. I learned how to prepare for a difficult discussion, how to highlight key points, how to shift perspective, how to keep a client calm when critical things happen, and most importantly, I began to realize the essential role of transparency as a behavioral trait. And I wanted to understand how he managed to get there, at that point in his life. I was curious how much of it was talent and how much was hard work, I wanted to understand how he set his priorities and managed to keep his focus, being in that demanding role at the head of the company, and in the same time being constantly concerned with his personal development. I had so many questions and I realized that I had no way of finding my answers just through our regular interactions.
So, one day, I worked up my courage to approach him directly, to find out his perspective about the balance between personal and career development, and asked if he was willing to help me with some answers to my questions, and maybe give me some suggestions as well. Before approaching him, I had mixed feelings of fear and embarrassment, because it felt like my approach was juvenile, and at the same time I was asking him for a personal favor pushing things too far maybe, but curiosity was bigger and stronger than all my other feelings. However, to my pleasant surprise, not only did he show his availability, but also told me he will gladly do it, and invited me to lunch one day to expand some more on my search.
The discussion I had with him during that lunch was an eye opener for me, because that was probably the first time in my life I consciously realized the difference between someone’s avatar and core-self. Even tough Mike was very open and transparent in his daily office interactions, he still wore his office avatar, because the situation demanded it. During that lunch, I was able to see beyond his avatar. Later on, I truly understood that behind every VP, CEO, CFO, etc. , there is a real human being, who is just like me — with human emotions and needs — and if I have the courage and the curiosity to approach, I might even get to know them. And that is the real gain of the game.
After that lunch, during most of the interactions we had, Mike used to give me a new piece of tailored advice to help me develop, both professionally and personally. That’s when I discovered the value of having a mentor, and also the advantages of having the courage to be curious and search for the right people and the right things. And I learned that transparency is equally important in business, as it is in life in general. Mike had a saying about transparency, which stuck with me ever since: “When you turn on the lights in the room, the elephant has nowhere to hide.”
After a few months, there was a job opening at his company. Since the hardest and the most interesting part of my project on stabilizing their IT infrastructure was ending, I said to myself that could be an interesting opportunity for me and I took a shot at it. When I told Mike about my application, he said to me instantly: “I hope you don’t have plans for tonight, cause you have a job interview”. We went out that evening to play darts and drink beers, and I discovered he was a great sport and funny as well, besides being open and transparent. I was convinced instantly not only will it be a great job, but I’ll continue to have an excellent mentor in Mike for the years to come. And apparently my behavior convinced him also that I was going to be a good fit for his plans, because the next day I was signing a contract with my new company.
After a few years working with Mike, it was time for me to move on. I had learned so much from him and had evolved into a much better version of myself, but I was feeling that curiosity was pushing me to discover new things again. So, I decided to change jobs, but we stayed friends and I am grateful for everything he had taught me.
In all my career so far, I only got one job landed after applying for it online. For all the others, I tried to approach the right people personally. I chose to do it that way, and I recommend others to do it also, because I think it’s far more natural. While having your description written in your CV and applying for jobs online is a common practice these days, it can disconnect you from the real world. Approaching people directly and personally, makes you seek human connection. Which, in my opinion, is far more important as the job itself. Because we are social creatures, and we need interactions and collaboration to feel whole. And by approaching people directly, you develop your courage and your confidence, among many other useful and humane skills.
